12-17-2005, 08:13 PM | #1 |
Moderator Rule Breaker Join Date: Feb 2004 Location: Austin, Tx
Posts: 5,970
| dear Santa.......
IF SANTA ANSWERED HIS MAIL, HONESTLY.... Dear Santa, I wud like a kool toy spase ranjur fer Xmas. Iv ben a gud boy all yeer. Yer frend, Billy Dear Billy, Nice spelling. Your on your way to a career in lawn care. How bout i send you a book so you can learn to read and write? Im giving your older brother a space ranger, At least HE can spell! -Santa ----------------------------------- Dear Santa, I have been a good girl all year and all i ask for is peace and joy all over the world for everybody Love, Sarah Dear Sarah, Your parents smoked pot when they had you didn't they?? Santa ----------------------------------- Dear Santa, I dont know if you can do this but for Christmas, I'd like my mommy and my daddy to get back together. Please see what you can do. Love, Tommy Dear Tommy, Look, your dad's banging the babysitter like a screen door in a huricane. Do you think he's gonna give that up to come back to your friged mom, who rides his *** constantly?? Its time to give up that dream, let me give you some nice legos insted Santa ----------------------------------- Dear Santa, I want a new bike, playstation, a train, G.I. Joes, a dog, a drum kit, a pony and a tuba Love, Francis Dear Francis, Who names their kid "Francis" nowadays?? I bet you're gay Santa ----------------------------------- Dear Santa, I left milk and cookies for you and carrots for you under the tree, and i left carrots for your reindeer outside the back door. Love, Susan Dear Susan, Milk gives me the runs and carrots make the deer fart in my face when I'm riding the sleigh. You want to do me a favor?? leave me a bottle of Scotch. Santa ----------------------------------- Dear Santa, What do you do the other 364 days a year? Are you busy making toys? Your friend, Thomas Dear Thomas, All the toys are made in China, I have a condo in Vegas, where i spend most of my time making amateur porno videos. I unwind by drinking myself stupid and squeezing the asses of cocktail waitresses while losing money at the craps table. hey, you wanted to know, Santa ----------------------------------- Dear Santa, Do you see us when we're sleeping, do you really know when were awake, like in the song?? Love, Jessica Dear Jessica, Are you really that gullible?? Good luck in whatever you do. I'm skipping your house Santa ----------------------------------- Dear Santa, I really really really want a puppy this year, Please please please PLEASE! PLEASE could i have one?? Timmy Dear Timmy, That whiney begging **** may work on your parents but that carp does not work with me your getting a piece of coal again so now shut the hell up Santa ----------------------------------- Dearest Santa, We dont have a chimney in our house, how do you get into our home? Love always, Marky Look Mark, First, stop calling yourself "Marky" That's whay you.re, getting your *** whipped at school. Second, you dont live in a house, you live in a low-rent apartment complex. Third, I get inside your pad just like all the burglars do: through your bedroom window Sweet Dreams, Santa |
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12-17-2005, 08:22 PM | #2 |
Rock Stacker Join Date: Aug 2005 Location: Hiding in a Cornfield
Posts: 65
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Lol I like the one with susan and the reindeers . |
12-17-2005, 08:51 PM | #3 |
RCC Addict Join Date: Jul 2005 Location: Provo
Posts: 1,868
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lol lmfao |
12-18-2005, 11:14 AM | #4 | |
Newbie Join Date: Jul 2005 Location: New Orleans
Posts: 47
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12-18-2005, 04:53 PM | #5 |
Pebble Pounder Join Date: Aug 2005 Location: Kenosha
Posts: 181
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oh man, christmas brings out the best in people, great stuff.!!!...
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12-18-2005, 07:53 PM | #6 |
Rock Crawler Join Date: May 2005 Location: omaha
Posts: 858
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banging the babysitter like a screen door in a huricane Oh, by the way, "Scotchy scotch scotch, I love scotch!" |
12-18-2005, 08:06 PM | #7 | |
RCC Addict Join Date: Aug 2005 Location: VARCOR
Posts: 1,826
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Yer frend, Robb | |
12-18-2005, 09:57 PM | #8 | |
I wanna be Dave Join Date: Sep 2005 Location: *
Posts: 2,877
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Santa | |
12-18-2005, 10:55 PM | #9 | |
Moderator Rule Breaker Join Date: Feb 2004 Location: Austin, Tx
Posts: 5,970
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12-19-2005, 04:39 AM | #10 |
Pebble Pounder Join Date: Nov 2005 Location: Honolulu
Posts: 109
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Well, his response was a freaking joke too... |
12-19-2005, 02:39 PM | #11 | |
RCC Addict Join Date: Aug 2005 Location: VARCOR
Posts: 1,826
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12-19-2005, 02:45 PM | #12 |
Adilynsdad too! Join Date: May 2004 Location: G ville
Posts: 8,844
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Dear Santa, Just send me the amateur porn, as long as it does'nt feature my wife. |
12-19-2005, 02:48 PM | #13 |
R.I.P. Chip Join Date: Jan 2004 Location: The Crawler State
Posts: 13,938
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Dear Braceysdad, I am sorry I looked through every amateur porn I could find and I was unable to locate any that did not feature your wife. Anal, facials, gang bang, she does it all! P.S. Tell her I'll be late tonight, it is my busy season you know. |
12-19-2005, 02:52 PM | #14 |
Adilynsdad too! Join Date: May 2004 Location: G ville
Posts: 8,844
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Dear Santa, That tea bagging ho, she always told me santa was not real. I should have known better when she said Santa brought her a "pearl necklace" last year. I never saw her wear it. |
12-19-2005, 03:29 PM | #15 | |
R.I.P. Chip Join Date: Jan 2004 Location: The Crawler State
Posts: 13,938
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I saw the pearl necklace and it was great, she loved it. Wait till she tells you about the dirty sanchez I am giving to her this year! Santa | |
12-19-2005, 03:32 PM | #16 |
Adilynsdad too! Join Date: May 2004 Location: G ville
Posts: 8,844
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Well at least your not bringing her a "snow ball" again. P.S. Your a sick basturd Santa, could you leave me your number for tips and tricks |
12-19-2005, 06:36 PM | #17 |
I wanna be Dave Join Date: Jun 2004 Location: Centennial, CO
Posts: 2,129
| You guys crack me up! |
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