What's wrong with today's kids?

[STEEL_CITY_CRAWLER]

i think another thing that is a problem is the whole pussifacation of school activities, as well.

i had great parents, they raised me properly, but from 2nd grade on to a year or so in college, i also had sports helping me out, and teaching me respect, and to work for what you want.

[EvilTwin v2]

Originally Posted by danielk

I was raised by my grandparents. Nuff said.

Not sure which side of that you came from. I've seen some grandparents that were really old school and raised their grand kids with the strap or switch, but then I've seen some that had really mellowed and raised the grand kids by giving them everything to make up for the parents not being there.

[ThinkTank]

Originally Posted by EvilTwin v2

Not sure which side of that you came from..

Yeah, obviously he posted in thread about tough love because his grandparents were liberal weenies.

[easleycrawler]

Originally Posted by bivens22

NP, Robbio. I think the fact that everyone is afraid to bust their kids' asses is the problem. I got onto my son the other day while shopping. I could not tell you how many ugly faces I got from other people. I have taught my son to respect others, and to not act the fool when in public. I love it when people threaten me with CPS. I think that is great! They won't spank their own hellions, and they want to tell me how to raise my kids.

Agree 100%, I feel the same way. And i got 2 sons a 7 year old and a 2 year old.

[cave-man]

Originally Posted by STEEL_CITY_CRAWLER

i think another thing that is a problem is the whole pussifacation of school activities, as well.

i had great parents, they raised me properly, but from 2nd grade on to a year or so in college, i also had sports helping me out, and teaching me respect, and to work for what you want.

I agree, I have 4 kids that are amazingly well behaved. My wife and I are strict parents that don't give in. I see a lot of parents that don't want to take the time or energy to follow through with discipline, If your a parent you know how exhausting it is. My kids love me and respect me because I care enough to discipline.

Sports and activities are a great way to teach kids to respect others. Being on a team gives them real world experience in working and dealing with other people. My kids are involved in Baseball and swimming. They also play outside and aren't allowed to sit and watch TV for hours on end.

I think the key to discipline is finding what works for the individual kid, spankings don't work for all kids, one of my daughters would just laugh through the tears. She hates to be grounded though. This is just an example.

The hardest part for me is remembering that my kids are unique individuals that require custom discipline for there unique personalities. I truely believe that kids are a product of there environment and that parents teach by example weather it's good or bad.

[kasper]

Ialso agree my kid lived with her mom till she moved in with dear old dad she was seven when she was with me for the week and got some what dis respectful i cracked her on the ass just like i was brought up she told me she was calling the cops i packeed her in the truck she asked where we were going i replied to the cop shop she cried and cried and i responded i am going to jail and your going to a detention center since mom is no where to be found she however said it will never happen again and she was sorry to make a long story short parents should be able to spank there children if needed not beat them.

She still lives with dad at 20 and is a college student now with less then a year and she will be a rn

[Offroader5]

I don't have kids myself, but get to see the undisciplined kids running around my street. Have a family across the street that can't even teach their kids to not damage property that isn't theirs...and when they are called out on it by me when I catch them in the act, the parents act like I'm the bad guy. They completely torn the crap out of the whole front yard landscaping at the rented apartment they are living in. Worse yet, after I let the owners in on what they were doing to the only 2 year old landscaping...they seemed lax about the whole thing and seemingly did nothing about it that I know of.

I've flat out told the parents of the lil "street gang" that they'd better learn to discipline their kids or I'll just call the cops and let them handle it. Caught one of them taking mail out of my box. Another thing they allow is their kids to swear up and down right in front of them. I've heard them say everything in the book over there, just as bad or worse than any of us on here would. I'll admit that I would swear when I wasn't around my parents, but even then I didn't do it alot till I was at least 14-15...and I remember the first time I let one slip in front of my mom...

People are so afraid to do anything now-a-days. Smack your kids ass with the belt and leave a mark and before you know it you're answering for yourself in front of CPS. I remember the belt, and how well it worked.

I think I'd be a pretty strict parent, but I guess you really don't know till you have them right there in front of you. Maybe perception changes somewhat.

[paintballer9876]

I think most of the blame can be put on todays parents, blaming the kids for what their parents are supposed to teach them is stupid. The people that created the laws and are afraid to discipline are the ones at fault, if you where thrown into todays society and raised would you be any different?

[sdcrawls]

Originally Posted by EvilTwin v2

Where are these kids' parents? In my day, I'd have had my ass beat multiple times if I ever acted like that.

^^^^This

If I ever spoke or acted the way any of my dozen nephews do my old man would have put my head through a wall. Then probably kicked my butt a bit when we got home.

[stubs179]

It is a vicious cycle. Adults said the same thing about you when you were a kid, they said the same thing when i was a kid and kids now a days will say the same thing about children when they are adults.

[thumper68]

Personally I will blame the Parents, more so than the laws. I was not raised by belt wielding parents, But If I did something wrong a got a swat from a wooden spoon. When I got older it was being grounded that I hated. No TV, No Computer, No Toys.

I am raising my kids the same way, when they were little it was a swat or 2 on the behind, now that they are older they have to spend some time standing at attn. with there nose just touching the wall.

I think the biggest problem is daycare, not that there aren't some great daycares, its that parents feel guilty for not spending time with their kids like their parents spent with them.

Here is a typical day of one of my friends and her kids:
During school
Up at 6am quick breakfast
6:45am out the door to drop the kids off at school
2:30 pm the kids walk to daycare
5:15pm pick kids up
5:20 dinner from fast food (they do subway allot)
5:45 drop oldest daughter off at Hockey practice
6:00pm drop son off at hockey Practice
6:30pm take youngest daughter to dance 2 nights a week, 2 more nights are gymnastics
8:00pm arrive home and put youngest to bed
another hockey parent drops off the older 2 after practice (we take turns doing this for her)
9pm to 10pm homework then bed for the kids

Sat and Sun? house work, shopping, and all the other stuff that didn't get done during the week.

During school breaks it is much the same but replace school with full time daycare.

The kids dad works on the road so he is only home 2 or 3 weekends a month, They both try and compensate for the lack of time they spend with the kids by giving them whatever they ask for, and the grandparents are even worse.

These are the 3 most spoiled kids I have ever met.

The worst part is I know how much the dad makes, If they didn't buy 2 new cars every year and cut back on eating out the mom could quit working, and be there for the kids.

When our 2nd kid was born my wife and I decided that she could stay home with the kids if we cut back on a few things, eating out, movies, new cars.

Its now 14 years later and our kids tend to behave when in public, they have a sense of responsibility. They still talk back and fight with each other, but that is to be expected, I know my sis and I fought allot.

I have allot to thank my wife for, she gave up her career to raise our kids, and she has done a wonderful job of it.

I know that not everyone is in a position to have 1 parent stay home, but if they are in a 1 parent home or both parents have to work then the best thing to do is cut back on outside activities and raise your own kids.

[RaleighRCer]

Too many parents want to be friends with their kids. You are not friends, you are the parents! My dad told me when I was young, " I would like you to like me and I would love it if you love me, but no matter what, you will respect me". I am glad he is my dad because he made me into the person I am today.

[country_crawler]

Originally Posted by Offroader5

I don't have kids myself, but get to see the undisciplined kids running around my street. Have a family across the street that can't even teach their kids to not damage property that isn't theirs...and when they are called out on it by me when I catch them in the act, the parents act like I'm the bad guy. They completely torn the crap out of the whole front yard landscaping at the rented apartment they are living in. Worse yet, after I let the owners in on what they were doing to the only 2 year old landscaping...they seemed lax about the whole thing and seemingly did nothing about it that I know of.

I've flat out told the parents of the lil "street gang" that they'd better learn to discipline their kids or I'll just call the cops and let them handle it. Caught one of them taking mail out of my box. Another thing they allow is their kids to swear up and down right in front of them. I've heard them say everything in the book over there, just as bad or worse than any of us on here would. I'll admit that I would swear when I wasn't around my parents, but even then I didn't do it alot till I was at least 14-15...and I remember the first time I let one slip in front of my mom...

People are so afraid to do anything now-a-days. Smack your kids ass with the belt and leave a mark and before you know it you're answering for yourself in front of CPS. I remember the belt, and how well it worked.

I think I'd be a pretty strict parent, but I guess you really don't know till you have them right there in front of you. Maybe perception changes somewhat.

I'd fire there asses up with a belt in my yard right in front of the parents.

[Del Montess]

I'm 21, and have had the same opinion of "kids today" since I was about 12. I'm pretty sure I was born about 10 or 20 years too late, haha.

my parents never raised a hand to me. no, wait, i take that back. I got spanked once for coloring on my walls. I never did anything bad because I was terrified of them being angry or, even worse, disappointed... sometimes when they were lecturing me (and making me feel realy guilty for violating their trust) I kind of wished they were the grab a belt kind of parents... the guilt method worked really well for them... but I can see why it doesn't for most parents... kids don't give a flying rats patootie most of the time.
They raised me wanting for nothing, but with the good basis that you have to work for what you get. my allowance was always based on what chores I did, and each chore had a monetary value, i didn't do the chore, it was that much deducted from my allowance, do extra chores, get extra money.

the only time whining worked for me was when I brought home an animal (pretty much because my parents are suckers for animals and couldn't send them away). I still do this today, and it bugs the crap out of Jake... but I'm working on it...

[Krawler Konceptz]

Originally Posted by thumper68

now that they are older they have to spend some time standing at attn. with there nose just touching the wall.

I hated that...was worst than a belt or a swat..dad said it saved his hands from hurting.
I am now 35 and have 3 babies one is 3 , 17months, and 6 months.
Swat on bum is always last resort. Usually with just a slight raise of voice gets the attention from the 2 older ones.
My son you get better reaction raising your voice a tad than a swat cuz he looks at you for a second and carries on.

[DeweyCJ5]

Originally Posted by danielk

I was raised by my grandparents. Nuff said.

same here

[EvilTwin v2]

Maybe it's because I grew up in a smaller community where people knew who each other were and watched out for each other, but I can assure you that I never acted around adults the way these kids do.

As for my own kids, my 6 year old daughter Sophia is my friend along with respecting me. I try to involve her in everything that I do that's age appropriate. On the other side of it, I do demand respect and discipline from her. While she has received her share of spankings, I've found that simply telling her that I'm disappointed in her has far greater affect on her. My 3 year old, Zoey, is completely different, though. We have yet to figure out how to reach her...maybe she's still too young. So, in order to keep her behaving appropriately, we just have to keep a tighter leash on her. Yes, it's alot of work, but I believe in keeping a close eye on my kids and I crack down quickly when they act up, but I also try to reward just as quickly for doing something really good (whether performance at school, in sports, dance, etc...or just simply doing something really nice for somebody without needing to be told).

Maybe I'm also fortunate that I spent 3 years of college as a direct care worker for a couple of the most violent mentally handicapped adults in the state. I learned very quickly what to do or not to do, because when they acted out, they wouldn't just embarrass you in public, you stood a chance of physical injury. It's amazing, even as an adult, how getting your ass kicked a few times will teach you what to do and what not to do.

Basically, it's my thought that parents need to spend more time with their kids. Kids need structure and discipline in their lives, and they'll try to rebel and do whatever they can to get attention.

[SMUDGEBUG]

I'll put my hand up and say I was one of those spoilt brats that had everything you could ever want, that didnt stop my parents from showing me love and the correct way of behaving. They spoilt me because i was the youngest and was from day one basically being groomed into taking over the family business. I respect my parents and others and will take the shirt off my own back to help someone. I know as a parent I have created three monsters by buying them better gifts then last years just to try and keep them happy. But last year I sat down with my wife and we discused what we were doing to our kids and decided it was time for them to respect and enjoy what they recieve, and guess what ? It worked ! The kids value more the stuff they are given and take more care of the items they got in the past. We have the "anti anything to your child law" here too and since its been inforced in this country the crime rate in youths has risen 44%. In the last week alone 5 teenages have been killed in drunken brawls or gang fights. The parents need to be held responsible to a point as well !

My 14 yr old recently went behind our backs after us saying no, he went and got his lip peirced at school he came home got made take the ring out and lost internet and all computer privallages for a week and it's amazing how much he has changed in that time. He's almost become human and dos'nt talk in grunts and groans lol.

Bring back the days when a Police man would scare you shitless and you would never ever do that again !

[Stormin2u]

I think the kids are just fine it's the parents and educators that are screwed up and should get the blame.

[LR3]

For the last 7 years I have been raised in a single parent home. When I was 8 years old, my father passed away due to a heart attack a age 39. For the 8 years that I was lucky enough to have him, he taught me the basics of respect. Over the course of the past 7 years, my mom has taught us to earn money for the things we need, and not to expect things to be handed to you on a silver platter. Yes, my mom will pitch in money here and there, but I always pay her back. The problem with most kids today is the fact that they always get, get, get and always expect more. Another problem is the fact that kids get into drugs, alcohol and other stuff with the excuse, "life is rough man, I got loads of homework, parents, need a new this, or want a new that". I have been fatherless for 7 years and they think it is a tough life because they geta few math problems for homework everynight. I know a tough life. I am not trying to get sympothy or anything, but I have been through some tough times and have never gotton into drigs or alcohol and always earn money for the stuff I want. Nuff said.