Where should I retire?

[run2jeepn]

Where to Live After Retirement


You can live in <?xml:namespace prefix = st1 ns = "urn:schemas-microsoft-comffice:smarttags" /><st1lace w:st="on"><st1:City w:st="on">Phoenix</st1:City> , <st1:State w:st="on">Arizona</st1:State></st1lace> where.....<?xml:namespace prefix = o ns = "urn:schemas-microsoft-comfficeffice" /><o></o>
1. You are willing to park 3 blocks away because you found shade.<o></o>
2. You've experienced condensation on your butt from the hot water in <o></o>
the toilet bowl.<o></o>
3. You can drive for 4 hours in one direction and never leave town.<o></o>
4. You have over 100 recipes for Mexican food.<o></o>
5. You know that "dry heat" is comparable to what hits you in the face <o></o>
when you open your oven door.<o></o>
6. The 4 seasons are: tolerable, hot, really hot, and ARE YOU KIDDING <o></o>
ME??!!<o></o>
<o></o>
You can Live inCaliforniawhere...<o></o>
1. You make over $250,000 and you still can't afford to buy a house.<o></o>
2. The fastest! part of your commute is going down your driveway.<o></o>
3. You know how to eat an artichoke.<o></o>
4. You drive your rented Mercedes to your neighborhood block party.<o></o>
5. When someone asks you how far something is, you tell them how long it <o></o>
will take to get there rather than how many miles away it is.<o></o>
6. The 4 seasons are: Fire, Flood, Mud, and Drought.<o></o>
<o></o>
<o></o>
You can Live in <st1:City w:st="on"><st1lace w:st="on">New York City</st1lace></st1:City> where ...;<o></o>
1. You say "the city" and expect everyone to know you meanManhattan.<o></o>
2. You can get into a four-hour argument about how to get from <st1:City w:st="on"><st1lace w:st="on">Columbus</st1lace></st1:City> <o></o>
Circleto Battery Park, but can't find <st1:State w:st="on"><st1lace w:st="on">Wisconsin</st1lace></st1:State> on a map.<o></o>
3.You think <st1lace w:st="on">Central Park</st1lace> is "nature,"<o></o>
4. You believe that being able to swear at people in their own <o></o>
language makes you multi-lingual.<o></o>
5. You've worn out a car horn.<o></o>
6. You think eye contact is an act of aggression.<o></o>
<o></o>
You can Live in <st1:State w:st="on"><st1lace w:st="on">Maine</st1lace></st1:State> where...<o></o>
1. You only have four spices: salt, pepper, ketchup, and <st1:State w:st="on"><st1lace w:st="on">Tabasco</st1lace></st1:State> ..<o></o>
2. Halloween costumes fit over parkas.<o></o>
3. You have more than one recipe for moose.<o></o>
4. Sexy lingerie is anything flannel with less than eight buttons.<o></o>
5. The four seasons are: winter, still winter, almost winter, and <o></o>
construction.<o></o>
<o></o>
You can Live in the <st1lace w:st="on">Deep South</st1lace> where...<o></o>
1. You can rent a movie and buy bait in the same store.<o></o>
2. "y'all" is singular and "all y'all" is plural.<o></o>
3. "He needed killin'" is a valid defense.<o></o>
4. Everyone has 2 first names: Billy Bob, Jimmy Bob, Mary Sue, Betty <o></o>
Jean, MARY BETH, etc.<o></o>
<o></o>
You can live in <st1:State w:st="on"><st1lace w:st="on">Colorado</st1lace></st1:State> where...<o></o>
1. You carry your $3,000 mountain bike atop your $500 car.<o></o>
2. You tell your husband to pick up Granola on his way home and he <o></o>
stops at the day care center.<o></o>
3. A pass does not involve a football or dating.<o></o>
4. The top of your head is bald, but you still have a pony tail.<o></o>
<o></o>
<o></o>
You can live in the <st1lace w:st="on">Midwest</st1lace> where...<o></o>
1. You've never met any celebrities, but the mayor knows your name.<o></o>
2. Your idea of a traffic jam is ten cars waiting to pass a tractor or <o></o>
an Amish buggy.<o></o>
3. You have had to switch from "heat" to "A/C" on the same day.<o></o>
4. You end sentences with a preposition: "Where's my coat at?"<o></o>
5. When asked how your trip was to any exotic place, you say, "It was <o></o>
different!"<o></o>
<o></o>
AND You can live in <st1:State w:st="on"><st1lace w:st="on">Florida</st1lace></st1:State> where..<o></o>
1. You eat dinner at 3:15 in the afternoon.<o></o>
2. All purchases include a coupon of some kind -- even houses and cars.<o></o>
3. Everyone can recommend an excellent dermatologist.<o></o>
4. Road construction never ends anywhere in the state.<o></o>
5. Cars in front of you are often driven by headless people

 

[trickedoutTLT06]

<o></o>5. The four seasons are: winter, still winter, almost winter, and <o></o>
construction.<o></o>
<o></o>



hey it was like 93 today :lol:

 

[nitromtcrawler]

really funny i havent heard anything so comical in a while!!:lol: lolx300000000 it was hilarius(sp). the california thing is so true!! i really liked the duble first names! billy bob...

 

[Double J]

I felt this was funny.

"2. You tell your husband to pick up Granola on his way home and he stops at the day care center."

 

[musicmaniac]

1. You are willing to park 3 blocks away because you found shade.<?xml:namespace prefix = o ns = "urn:schemas-microsoft-comfficeffice" /><o></o>
2. You've experienced condensation on your butt from the hot water in <o></o>
the toilet bowl.<o></o>
<o></o>
5. You know that "dry heat" is comparable to what hits you in the face <o></o>
when you open your oven door.<o></o>
<o></o>
<o></o>

HAHA!!! Awesome. Its only a high of 98 today though! But there is a flash flood warning until 8:30 tonight. It was up to 119 degrees last week though. That has got to be one of the best things I have read in a while though. And opening your front door is JUST like opening the oven some days. LOL "thumbsup"

 

[4link4eva]

2. "y'all" is singular and "all y'all" is plural.<?xml:namespace prefix = o ns = "urn:schemas-microsoft-comfficeffice" /><o></o>
3. "He needed killin'" is a valid defense.<o></o>
4. Everyone has 2 first names: Billy Bob, Jimmy Bob, Mary Sue, Betty <o></o>
Jean, MARY BETH, etc.

Y'all had me PMSL at this point... :lol:

 

[Grizzly4x4]

F'in LOL!!!! :lol::lol:

 

[Stormin2u]

Come on JP ya gotta love AC to heat same day?????? 8)

Don't for get to role yourwordstogehterwhenyouspeak....."thumbsup"

 

[Shaun (yota)]

<?xml:namespace prefix = o ns = "urn:schemas-microsoft-comfficeffice" /><o></o>
AND You can live in God's waiting room ( <?xml:namespace prefix = st1 ns = "urn:schemas-microsoft-comffice:smarttags" /><st1:State w:st="on"><st1lace w:st="on">Florida )</st1lace></st1:State> where..<o></o>
1. You eat dinner at 3:15 in the afternoon.<o></o>
2. All purchases include a coupon of some kind -- even houses and cars.<o></o>
3. Everyone can recommend an excellent dermatologist.<o></o>
4. Road construction never ends anywhere in the state.<o></o>
5. Cars in front of you are often driven by headless people

fix it for you