THX_138 sorry I post in between.
Awe man, please don't apologize for expressing your loss and sharing.
I am honored the response this thread has received and saddened at the same time.
Honored because I thought it was going to be a simple explanation of why I dropped the ball approving an entire page of sale threads and makin y'all wait and beyond that selfishly venting out loud for a bit of added sanity.
Honored at the response of how many fellow hobbyists here care enough to post up their condolences and kind words and sharing of their own experiences.
Yet saddened by the amount of stories of other cancer victims.
I know people die
I know cancer is wide spread
But.... Being our forum is just a select piece of the world and to hear of so so many stories in such a brief time also cancer related is sad, very sad.
I will say ..... PLEASE .... Anyone who wishes to take a moment and express out more of their own story or experience with cancer or death of a loved one in general here in this thread... Please do not feel out of line or like you possibly shouldn't.
Please, everyone feel welcome to post whatever you want.
@ hotrodsonoma & wings_of_fire, my grandfather passed away years ago, (1983 actually) of throat cancer and I was only 16 at the time and remember it all very vividly. It was not a pretty thing and he suffered horribly. Chemo was in its infantile stages back then and I honestly fear it it did more harm then good.
In those 30+ years since then medicine has made monstrous leaps and bounds for the better.
The docs hammered my Mom with max levels of Chemo and radiation in attempts to keep her comfortable with the pain and also in hopes to set things in remission. With all that, yes, she got weak & tired, yes it did ultimately burn out her bone marrow and stop all platelet production for her blood etc...
But..... She never suffered from the horrible side effects and torture like my grandfather did so many years prior.
Albeit the way they've altered treatment or the medicines they give along with it, she never fought he vomiting or loss of appetite or additional pain and suffering from treatment. I know every body is different too, but she barely even lost much hair.
Medicine has come a long way and hopefully in another 30 years, cancer is as cure-able as the common cold or a headache.
I'll say it again, and can't say it enough.
I thank you all for the condolences and kind words, it really does mean a lot to see the support here at times like this.
Yes, I do consider everyone here my extended family and have gotten to know a LOT of y'all personally and am thankful for it.
Thank you all"thumbsup"
He said he was tired of living like that and wanted to die as quickly as possible. He was very close to me and I still remember those words which sadden me. Cancer is terrible. 
